[ Gray doesn't have much practical use for a garden plot in "enemy territory," but it would be terribly rude and wasteful of her to give it away or leave it unused — as with any gift. So after a careful journey to Greenwood Yards, she locates the plot Mordred mentioned and gets to work.
As always, digging into the earth reminds her of caskets and corpses, but all she has waiting to be buried this time are some innocent sprouts. She digs needlessly neat little holes with a trowel, sinking into the simple repetition of it until her mind becomes a mellow song of dirt chopped and piled without end. So absorbed is she in her task that she doesn't notice someone else approaching her plot... ]
[ For over a day now, Mordred's felt restless. Agitated. Rin isn't the only person she bickers with, not by a long shot, but she gives as good as she gets, and Mordred likes that about her — to her own detriment. Never did she think she'd find herself enjoying a mage's company, much less missing them. (With Gray's death, there had at least been an understanding of what had happened, a target for her rage, rather than this: swearing into the empty air, waiting for communion responses that never come.)
She decides that in the other girl's absence, she should at least do something useful (unlike Dark) and check on her plants, despite having little to no idea what to actually do about them. When she sees a small figure digging in the next plot over, she lifts her hand, ready to call out... only for her shoulders to sag in disappointment, her tone much more mild than usual when she does speak. ]
Oh... it's you, mouse. [ Despite her appearance being unchanged, she sounds exhausted and unfocused; clearly looking through Gray rather than at her. ] Did you find this place okay? Sorry if my directions sucked.
[ Gray stares openly at Mordred. This is definitely the most depressed she's seen her face twin... She stands slowly, abandoning the garden for the moment to peer closely at Mordred instead. ]
... Are you feeling okay? Are you low on energy again?
[ If it's that or an issue with Discord, then at least they're easily fixed. ]
[ Given the shift in topic, she supposes this means Mordred has been looking for Rin. It seems like Mordred dedicates herself when she has a goal in mind. It was the same when she was looking after Gray's Shard... ]
Mr. Dark has been staying with me, and I don't think he's found anything out either.
[ Who the fuck is Lost Dross. Well it's Dark apparently, but Gray is completely stumped on where the name comes from. Meanwhile, she placidly allows herself to be shaken, her hood flopping around on her head and only kept up by an absent hand. ]
H-He's behaved himself, so it hasn't been an issue... Really, he's harmless!
[ She might even say that serving her mentor trained her up for this specific purpose. He too preferred to sit around inside and be taken care of. It was a pretty different vibe, of course, but not enough that Gray feels like babysitting Dark is an alien task. ]
I'll be the judge of that! Besides, he's Zenith, and you're Meridian! What happened to self-preservation, you fool of a mouse?
[ She continues to shake Gray for a few more moments, before something catches her eye. While past-Mordred would have yanked Gray's hood off to get a closer look, present-Mordred is slightly more considerate, and Stares instead. ]
... Is it just me, or does your hair look different? There's something weird, right... here. [ Frowning, she reaches out toward Gray's bangs; still half-convinced she's seeing things. When it becomes apparent that she's not... she wraps her fingers around the offending streak and tugs on it aggressively. ] What. The hell. Is this? You've seen it, right? This blonde streak! It's the same colour as father's!
[ And her own, but of course she makes the comparison to King Arthur instead... ]
Shit... shit! How are you so calm right now? If this keeps up, you'll—!
[ "He's Zenith and you're Meridian," said the Zenite...
As this considerate version of Mordred proceeds to yank the hell out of Gray's hair, she braces her hands on Mordred to keep herself from accidentally headbutting her, even though Mordred would deserve it. With no hands to keep her hood up, it slips off — but at least it'll become clear that there are no other blonde spots in her hair except for the one. ]
I'll explain — but please let go!
[ HOW IS SHE SUPPOSED TO HAVE A CONVERSATION LIKE THIS... ]
But, no — Mordred does release her after a few good hair yanks, even if she looks annoyed at having to do so, and waves Gray's hands away from herself. ]
Explain, then! [ She attempts to sound demanding, but the Obvious Concern that she's trying and failing to hide just makes her sound huffy and petulant instead... so basically, no different from usual. Before Gray even has a chance to speak, she chimes in again with: ] You're taking too long! Hurry the hell up!
[ God. The peer pressure is fully on. Gray rubs her poor scalp as she races to explain. ]
Um, so, something strange happened where my consciousness went back to London before I was taken to Horos, and I kept living my life for a time as if I'd never met any of you. Or maybe I'd always had those memories, but they were returned to me...
A-Anyway, my mentor and I were under the Clock Tower when King Arthur was summoned. He was actually very far away, but because we were connected through Leylines, I was able to hear him making a contract with someone... and my body changed again to become a little more like his.
[ The gravity of her condition is completely lost in her rush to get everything out before Mordred starts trying to pull her hair out again. ]
But after that, we became disconnected. I don't think I should change anymore, unless King Arthur is summoned again...?
[ Looking back, it was kind of a freak incident. ]
[ Mordred's expression grows more and more inscrutable the longer Gray talks, but she thankfully doesn't interrupt with any yelling. In fact, her first words afterward are a quiet, muttered: ]
That must've been Red's war... [ With a noise of dissatisfaction, she crosses her arms and scowls again at the blonde streak. ] So, you're sure it's because of King Arthur being summoned? Nothing at all to do with anyo— anything else?
[ She has other concerns, but her major one is making sure she isn't giving Gray King Arthur cooties somehow. ]
[ At least Mordred is doing 100% less yelling and yanking now. Gray deflates a little, the tension draining from her shoulders, but the awareness remains of how hard Mordred is staring at that little blonde streak. ]
I'm almost certain. It's hard to explain, but it felt straightforward to me. I heard his voice [ a beautiful voice ] and felt the change in me all at once. It was more to do with my circuits, I think...
[ Her gaze droops as she wonders how much that's true even as she says it. What of her own is left to her anymore, except for her scar and the color of her hair? ]
But if that hadn't happened, I would have died. [ And more crucially, her mentor as well. ] So that's why I can't be too upset.
Hell no! [ Mordred cuts in, now mad for an entirely different reason. ] Just 'cause you survived, that doesn't mean you can't be upset! You can be as upset and pissed off as you want! And if you won't, then I'll be pissed off for you!
[ After a brief moment of hesitation, she glances at Gray's streak one more time, then holds out her fist. ]
Form a contract with me. [ She demands. ] Even if you aren't a real magus, if you have magic circuits, then you still have the capacity to be a Master. No matter the form, no matter how many times it takes, I'll rebel against King Arthur — so if he shows up here, I'll tell him to fuck off! That way, there won't be any more bullshit! And absolutely no more changing!
[ A breath fills her lungs as Mordred's anger roars over her. She stares at the fist extended toward her, and later she'll find it typical that Mordred thought first of a fist before an open hand to shake. Before that, Gray's expression presses into a solemn line, lagging understanding holding her tongue.
She should indeed be upset; she's been upset already for a majority of her life. A part of her is still anxious about her future and what she has left to lose, but in this one instance, the price was worth paying. She would pay it again without hesitation, knowing what it bought her.
But Mordred's anger isn't just for this one incident; the streak of blonde in Gray's hair isn't just a quirky cosmetic change. It's Arthur's blonde, it's Mordred's blonde. That part of Mordred's reaction doesn't surprise Gray. What surprises her is that Mordred would go so far. Knowing how Lord El-Melloi II revered his Servant, and how Heartless and Faker dominated as partners, Gray feels in her bones that she doesn't belong on that stage.
She continues to stare at Mordred's fist, not yet rejecting, but not yet accepting either. ]
You should have a better Master than me. I'm slow, and indecisive, and cowardly. Compared to you, I...
[ Despite all of Mordred's flaws, she's a lot of things Gray admires — would like to be herself. Bold, willful, driven, outspoken. Mordred's Master would reflect on her, Gray thinks, and she doesn't want to tarnish the pride that fills Mordred's entire being. Rin and Mordred would be a more suitable pair. ]
[Rin pipes up from a few plots down. While all her changes aren't evident from a first glance, the turquoise horns are. They rise from her forehead with a gentle backward arch; pure color at the tips and growing blacker towards her scalp. This is accompanied by the way that the whites of her eyes are gone, and instead her sclera are black (as opposed to the dingy grey they once were when a certain someone was kidnapped by Dark).
As she steps closer the moonlight filtering into the gardens reflects off of her blue, opalescent scales that are revealed in patches across her otherwise unblemished skin. For now her miniature wings are tucked in close to her back — folded out of view.]
Gray deserves a better Servant, but the only other one I know of is a god — and I doubt either one of use could supply that one.
[ Fortunately, Gray avoids getting chewed out, because Mordred switches into yelling-at-Rin mode without even realizing it. She swings to point her finger accusingly in the direction of the new voice. ]
Shut up, Red! I'm a first-rate knight and a first-rate Saber! The only one to surpass my father! The hell else could anyone ask for?
[ On the other end of the spectrum, Gray tuned out what Rin was saying about a sentence in, in favor of immediately trotting over to greet their errant mage. Unlike everyone else in the immediate vicinity, she's honest with her emotions and wears an open smile as she approaches. There's clearly something going on with Rin's appearance, but that's a smaller matter next to the simple fact that Rin is alive. ]
Rin! I'm so glad...
[ As she reaches Rin, she neglects to slow down; she takes advantage of her head-start by fully running into Rin with a relieved hug. Lately, she's lost some of her dearest friends — so a friend returned feels all the more precious. ]
[Reflexively her arms wrap around the smaller girl, and in an effort not to stumble and fall down into one of the precious flowerbeds, Rin lets them twirl around once in a circle so that the weight of Gray's momentum goes somewhere. Gently she lets Gray back down on her feet as color floods Tohsaka's cheeks.
How completely unfair for her to be so warm and cute! Her blush is interrupted a little by a patch of scales near her cheek, but that's no matter. Her gaze looks up to see if Mordred will still be intent on sending her back to The Tree after just getting back while Gray remains in her arms.]
[ Even Mordred isn't immune to the sight of a happy reunion hug... so instead of committing any acts of violence, she clicks her tongue and tries (fails) not to smile. Just looking at her, it's obvious that she wants to join in, but her stubbornness wins out — she decides that Gray has things covered, and opts to cross her arms instead, as if Banishing All Hug Thoughts. ]
Tch... seriously? You worry too much, idiot mouse. I told you she'd be fine!
[ But her lively attitude fades almost as quickly as it came. ]
What's with the new parts? [ For the third time, she asks about Rin's condition with absolutely no subtlety, and also completely ruins the mood. 🥳 ]
[ Gray sets back down on her feet and lets Rin go, satisfied. She steps back next to Mordred with her relief undeterred, the admonition sweeping past her. ]
Mm, well... Apparently I was strong enough to be considered for the hunting of my shard and experimentation of my body.
[So Dark's assumption that "she has to be dead not to yell at me," was right. Tohsaka sighs and fidgets with her bangs a little to better hide where the horns meet her skin.]
Hunting? Experimentation? The hell are you talking about?
[ She knows it's stupid to just echo Rin's words back at her, but she's honestly too stunned to do anything else. Her expression darkens, though she does her best to keep her tone level; the threats of a moment ago replaced by open concern. ]
Time out for a sec. Ignoring all that crap... [ as utterly impossible and ridiculous-sounding as that might be, ] right now, are you okay? Not okay-okay, but okay enough that you won't go dyin' on us — I mean, on the mouse? And don't you dare lie.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
action, soon after rin's revival
As always, digging into the earth reminds her of caskets and corpses, but all she has waiting to be buried this time are some innocent sprouts. She digs needlessly neat little holes with a trowel, sinking into the simple repetition of it until her mind becomes a mellow song of dirt chopped and piled without end. So absorbed is she in her task that she doesn't notice someone else approaching her plot... ]
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She decides that in the other girl's absence, she should at least do something useful (unlike Dark) and check on her plants, despite having little to no idea what to actually do about them. When she sees a small figure digging in the next plot over, she lifts her hand, ready to call out... only for her shoulders to sag in disappointment, her tone much more mild than usual when she does speak. ]
Oh... it's you, mouse. [ Despite her appearance being unchanged, she sounds exhausted and unfocused; clearly looking through Gray rather than at her. ] Did you find this place okay? Sorry if my directions sucked.
[ "Sorry"?????????????????????? ]
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... Are you feeling okay? Are you low on energy again?
[ If it's that or an issue with Discord, then at least they're easily fixed. ]
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[ She's 99% sure Gray would have messaged her if so, but it's all she can think to ask. ]
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[ Given the shift in topic, she supposes this means Mordred has been looking for Rin. It seems like Mordred dedicates herself when she has a goal in mind. It was the same when she was looking after Gray's Shard... ]
Mr. Dark has been staying with me, and I don't think he's found anything out either.
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[ Jarred out of her melancholy, she grabs Gray by the shoulders and shakes her. ]
Dammit, there's a limit to how much of a pushover someone can be! Don't get involved with weirdos like him! Or at least tell me first!
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[ Who the fuck is Lost Dross. Well it's Dark apparently, but Gray is completely stumped on where the name comes from. Meanwhile, she placidly allows herself to be shaken, her hood flopping around on her head and only kept up by an absent hand. ]
H-He's behaved himself, so it hasn't been an issue... Really, he's harmless!
[ She might even say that serving her mentor trained her up for this specific purpose. He too preferred to sit around inside and be taken care of. It was a pretty different vibe, of course, but not enough that Gray feels like babysitting Dark is an alien task. ]
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[ She continues to shake Gray for a few more moments, before something catches her eye. While past-Mordred would have yanked Gray's hood off to get a closer look, present-Mordred is slightly more considerate, and Stares instead. ]
... Is it just me, or does your hair look different? There's something weird, right... here. [ Frowning, she reaches out toward Gray's bangs; still half-convinced she's seeing things. When it becomes apparent that she's not... she wraps her fingers around the offending streak and tugs on it aggressively. ] What. The hell. Is this? You've seen it, right? This blonde streak! It's the same colour as father's!
[ And her own, but of course she makes the comparison to King Arthur instead... ]
Shit... shit! How are you so calm right now? If this keeps up, you'll—!
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As this considerate version of Mordred proceeds to yank the hell out of Gray's hair, she braces her hands on Mordred to keep herself from accidentally headbutting her, even though Mordred would deserve it. With no hands to keep her hood up, it slips off — but at least it'll become clear that there are no other blonde spots in her hair except for the one. ]
I'll explain — but please let go!
[ HOW IS SHE SUPPOSED TO HAVE A CONVERSATION LIKE THIS... ]
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But, no — Mordred does release her after a few good hair yanks, even if she looks annoyed at having to do so, and waves Gray's hands away from herself. ]
Explain, then! [ She attempts to sound demanding, but the Obvious Concern that she's trying and failing to hide just makes her sound huffy and petulant instead... so basically, no different from usual. Before Gray even has a chance to speak, she chimes in again with: ] You're taking too long! Hurry the hell up!
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Um, so, something strange happened where my consciousness went back to London before I was taken to Horos, and I kept living my life for a time as if I'd never met any of you. Or maybe I'd always had those memories, but they were returned to me...
A-Anyway, my mentor and I were under the Clock Tower when King Arthur was summoned. He was actually very far away, but because we were connected through Leylines, I was able to hear him making a contract with someone... and my body changed again to become a little more like his.
[ The gravity of her condition is completely lost in her rush to get everything out before Mordred starts trying to pull her hair out again. ]
But after that, we became disconnected. I don't think I should change anymore, unless King Arthur is summoned again...?
[ Looking back, it was kind of a freak incident. ]
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That must've been Red's war... [ With a noise of dissatisfaction, she crosses her arms and scowls again at the blonde streak. ] So, you're sure it's because of King Arthur being summoned? Nothing at all to do with anyo— anything else?
[ She has other concerns, but her major one is making sure she isn't giving Gray King Arthur cooties somehow. ]
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I'm almost certain. It's hard to explain, but it felt straightforward to me. I heard his voice [ a beautiful voice ] and felt the change in me all at once. It was more to do with my circuits, I think...
[ Her gaze droops as she wonders how much that's true even as she says it. What of her own is left to her anymore, except for her scar and the color of her hair? ]
But if that hadn't happened, I would have died. [ And more crucially, her mentor as well. ] So that's why I can't be too upset.
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[ After a brief moment of hesitation, she glances at Gray's streak one more time, then holds out her fist. ]
Form a contract with me. [ She demands. ] Even if you aren't a real magus, if you have magic circuits, then you still have the capacity to be a Master. No matter the form, no matter how many times it takes, I'll rebel against King Arthur — so if he shows up here, I'll tell him to fuck off! That way, there won't be any more bullshit! And absolutely no more changing!
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She should indeed be upset; she's been upset already for a majority of her life. A part of her is still anxious about her future and what she has left to lose, but in this one instance, the price was worth paying. She would pay it again without hesitation, knowing what it bought her.
But Mordred's anger isn't just for this one incident; the streak of blonde in Gray's hair isn't just a quirky cosmetic change. It's Arthur's blonde, it's Mordred's blonde. That part of Mordred's reaction doesn't surprise Gray. What surprises her is that Mordred would go so far. Knowing how Lord El-Melloi II revered his Servant, and how Heartless and Faker dominated as partners, Gray feels in her bones that she doesn't belong on that stage.
She continues to stare at Mordred's fist, not yet rejecting, but not yet accepting either. ]
You should have a better Master than me. I'm slow, and indecisive, and cowardly. Compared to you, I...
[ Despite all of Mordred's flaws, she's a lot of things Gray admires — would like to be herself. Bold, willful, driven, outspoken. Mordred's Master would reflect on her, Gray thinks, and she doesn't want to tarnish the pride that fills Mordred's entire being. Rin and Mordred would be a more suitable pair. ]
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[Rin pipes up from a few plots down. While all her changes aren't evident from a first glance, the turquoise horns are. They rise from her forehead with a gentle backward arch; pure color at the tips and growing blacker towards her scalp. This is accompanied by the way that the whites of her eyes are gone, and instead her sclera are black (as opposed to the dingy grey they once were when a certain someone was kidnapped by Dark).
As she steps closer the moonlight filtering into the gardens reflects off of her blue, opalescent scales that are revealed in patches across her otherwise unblemished skin. For now her miniature wings are tucked in close to her back — folded out of view.]
Gray deserves a better Servant, but the only other one I know of is a god — and I doubt either one of use could supply that one.
[Read: just fucking do it.]
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Shut up, Red! I'm a first-rate knight and a first-rate Saber! The only one to surpass my father! The hell else could anyone ask for?
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You're alive! [ Quickly followed by: ] Dammit, I'm gonna kill you!
[ She probably won't actually do it, but she's heading in Rin's direction... Gray might want to stop her. ]
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Rin! I'm so glad...
[ As she reaches Rin, she neglects to slow down; she takes advantage of her head-start by fully running into Rin with a relieved hug. Lately, she's lost some of her dearest friends — so a friend returned feels all the more precious. ]
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[Reflexively her arms wrap around the smaller girl, and in an effort not to stumble and fall down into one of the precious flowerbeds, Rin lets them twirl around once in a circle so that the weight of Gray's momentum goes somewhere. Gently she lets Gray back down on her feet as color floods Tohsaka's cheeks.
How completely unfair for her to be so warm and cute! Her blush is interrupted a little by a patch of scales near her cheek, but that's no matter. Her gaze looks up to see if Mordred will still be intent on sending her back to The Tree after just getting back while Gray remains in her arms.]
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Tch... seriously? You worry too much, idiot mouse. I told you she'd be fine!
[ But her lively attitude fades almost as quickly as it came. ]
What's with the new parts? [ For the third time, she asks about Rin's condition with absolutely no subtlety, and also completely ruins the mood. 🥳 ]
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What happened? Everyone was worried about you.
[ Maybe not everyone, but manyone. ]
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[So Dark's assumption that "she has to be dead not to yell at me," was right. Tohsaka sighs and fidgets with her bangs a little to better hide where the horns meet her skin.]
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[ She knows it's stupid to just echo Rin's words back at her, but she's honestly too stunned to do anything else. Her expression darkens, though she does her best to keep her tone level; the threats of a moment ago replaced by open concern. ]
Time out for a sec. Ignoring all that crap... [ as utterly impossible and ridiculous-sounding as that might be, ] right now, are you okay? Not okay-okay, but okay enough that you won't go dyin' on us — I mean, on the mouse? And don't you dare lie.
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If there's anything we can do to help...
[ A little bloodsharing, some Quality Bonding?? ]
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i lied
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